COMPETITION RESULTS

November 2020 Competition 

NOVEMBER 2020

 Overall Judge Remarks

Imagining a world very different to our own is always a challenging task. Often, while amid creating such a world through language, the writer encounters various obstacles, considerations, and possibilities that they must choose from and navigate through. In the selection of entries, I was delighted and impressed by the scope of imagination and world-building in each of the stories. The ideas in these entries are striking and the stories that were most original in the treatment of the theme took first and second place.

However, creating a world is one thing and telling a story is another. As a writer exploring speculative fiction of this nature, it’s important that on top of thinking up a world its vital that a compelling story is told where the ending provides a sense of satisfaction for the reader. The Far Side of the Sun by Raye Faye was such a story where the world-building was accomplished but the ending of the story detracted from the writer’s effort because it did not have a strong enough connection to the narrative that had gone before it.

In the entry that took first place (The History Lesson by Amerigo Verspucci) both world-building and story are delicately balanced, so much so that the reader only realizes they are in an alternative world near the end of the story. This plot twist, though subtle, was very effective because it allowed the writer to draw connections between inter-continental colonization and inter-planetary colonization. It was also evident that the writer did historical research to make sure that the characterization of the professor character matched the character’s supposed expertise.

In the story that took second place (The Thin Red Line by Athol Emmet), the choice of telling a story through email and written letters was a wise one because it worked well for the word-limit while also allowing the reader enough room to imagine the story unfold. Here too an element of intricate detail was admirable in how the writer though about the consequences of ‘space bugs’ and what they could and could not accomplish.

In the story that took third place (Buggered by O.G Wells) the writer told a tight, controlled narrative with a developed narrative voice. The writer also moved quite well between past and present while allowing the character to make interesting observations and analogies about diseases, cures, and Nature. This story also had a satisfactory ending to it that still left the reader questioning and wondering what would happen.

Issues of transitions and pacing appear throughout the entries. When it comes to transitions its important to remember that the reader requires information that situates them in space and time, even if most of the story is a monologue. This allows the reader a fuller submersion in the story. A lot of the stories in this competition used long paragraphs of dialogue and explanation and for most writers I advised finding ways to intersperse these long explanations with movement, action, or description in the story to give a sense of pacing but also a textured reading experience. Also, when transitioning to another time, another place, or another narrative voice its important that the writer thinks of ways to indicate this to the reader. Remember, readers are not privy to a writer’s internal thoughts and so, sometimes, explicit indication of transitions in the narrative need to be made for a smooth reading experience. This also relates to writing dialogue, and making sure the reader can see, or infer from the context, who is speaking at any time during a story.

Lastly, I want to bring the writer’s attention to the issue of ‘overwriting’. By this I mean the tendency to use a lot of adverbs or adjectives to describe something that can be said in one or two words. As writers, we love language, and we want to include as many delicious words as we can into our narrative. But, as a writer, we are also challenged to think of ‘the best word, or ‘the best description’ for a character, place, situation etc. Challenging ourselves to use the very best phrases (instead of using multiple phrases to describe something) hones our discernment as writers and helps contour our narrative with precise and polished language.

Overall, I was impressed with the level of imagination in these entries, and I encourage every writer to continue to read widely, and voraciously, and to also continue writing with an eye toward originality.

DECEMBER 2020 – JANUARY 2021

The following entries were received:

OVERALL COMMENTARY: this was an exercise in preparing your book for submission to a publisher, in which the synopsis covers the whole book and is crucial in whetting their appetite; and Chapter 1 is all about the quality of your writing and whether you can engage the publisher’s reader enough to do a deal with you!  I was impressed by your creativity.

It is sensible to have a literate friend read through your submission to pick up any obvious grammatical and other errors – it shows that you care. Generally, narrative should be in clear correct English (or whatever other language you are writing in), whereas dialogue will vary according to the speech habits of the characters: it is dangerous and confusing to mix styles.

I have taken the required word count to apply solely to the first chapter, the synopsis being an extra item.

February Competition 2021

 The following entries were received:

Thank you to the entrants for submitting their stories.

All the entries displayed creativity, excellent attention to detail, and a strong understanding of a story’s progression (from beginning, to middle, and end).

For a story to be good, it has to carry the reader from the first sentence to the last paragraph. The five final stories managed to do this very well.

The three winning entries were chosen as follows:

1. Dreams of Sleeping
2. Deceit and Deception
3. True Love Always Finds a WayWinning entries were chosen for their combination of several elements. Strong characters, effective flow, and natural dialogue are important things to see in any story which has editing or publishing potential.

   Well done for achieving great stories – one of the most important writing goals!

   To all the entrants, the art of writing is a neverending craft. The more you keep at it, the better your writing will be.

AJC.2021

March 2021 Competition

Thank you for agreeing to judge our March Competition detailed below.

The entrants’ brief was as above.

The following entries were received:

Overall comments.

Three entries were received.

My reading of the brief is that the opening scene of a play about the betrayal of a boss by his/her deputy is required.  As the running time is 20 minutes, it is expected that the whole play would be quite a lot longer.

The stories were ingenious, but two of them seemed to me to have been completed, with resolution, within the 20 minutes limit, in that I could not fathom how they would continue to the next act or scene. Two aspects struck me as needing practice.

Firstly, stage directions do not have to have every gesture itemised – it is the play’s director’s job to do that, and an experienced actor needs very little direction of that kind anyway. Stage directions are just that: directions for setting up the stage, lighting and props, including noting who is on stage at curtain-up.

The second, and this applies to all written dialogue but especially in a play which is, after all, totally dependent on speech, is to emphasise the importance of reading ALOUD what you have written. This exercise is vital in ensuring that your work is both readable and playable. We all tend to speak rather sloppily, so it is not necessary to have characters speaking perfect “book” English as that would be unrealistic, but they must retain consistency in their speaking habits.

In sum, the only way to write well is through practising your skills, reading and watching plays, and reading through your script aloud. Friends who hear you declaiming may think you have finally gone mad, but little do they know that you are the next Shakespeare, Rattigan, Ayckbourn or Fugard!